Some of you may or may not remember that back on the old forums, we had fun little ask and answer sessions with several of the comic’s characters. Sadly, those were lost in the Great Internet Monster Fiasco of ‘06. But since I’m wildly bored at work, here once again is your chance to ask a character a deep probing question. And who shall be the subject of our inquiries? Fan Favorite (for some reason): The vampire and Archduke Uriah Coe.

Comment on this topic with a question for his Grace, and he will be replying to the questions he favors. He can be terribly picky. Enjoy.

11.07.06 - Haxar asks:

1) How did you become a vampire?
2) Can you turn into any sort of animal like a bat or wolf?
3) What is your opinion of Joss Whedon?

“I became a vampire like every other vampire. I was bitten, drained completely, and fed the blood of my Mistress shortly before expiring. Turning into other animals is pure myth. I will not question the certain supernatural abilities of older, Master Vampires, such as strength, speed, hypnotism, so on so forth, shapeshifting is not one of our abilities. We are vampires, not fairies. And what is Joss Wheaton? A breakfast cereal?”

11.09.06 - B asks:

What music do you like? It seems your tastes may be somewhat more refined than the average ‘man off the street’.

“So it would seem. Being Austrian, of course, it is in my blood to appreciate what you would call ‘classical’ music. Mozart, Strauss, Shubert, Beethoven, and of course my favorite, Wagner. In my living youth, I enjoyed dancing the quicker ländlers, the waltzes, so I appreciate that music. I part ways with my heritage when it comes to schrammelmusik, however, which is Austrian folk music. Not a fan. Lucas has introduced me to the new ‘rag.’ I still don’t know what to make of that.”

11.10.06 - crazyninny wonders:

*Batters eyelases.* If you would please Uriah. *Gets close into his face.* What shampoo do you use? Is this your natural skin color? *Pinches his skin.* Are your ears naturally pointy? *Pinches ears.*
And above all, what do you like in a girl. *Sigh, and batters her eyelases some more.*

“…”

“First and foremost, don’t touch me. Secondly, what you see is indeed my ‘natural’ state, if you can call it that. More accurate, I suppose, to call it a supernatural state, hm? In any case, the pale skin and emaciated appearance is due to feeding on nothing but chicken blood for months.”

“What do I like in a girl? Type AB.”

11.10.06 - Kingdom would like to know:

Two questions, if you please.
The first being “Do you enjoy being a vampire?” I ask this because people talk about how cool or exciting it would be to be a vampire, but I’m wondering the vampire’s point of view on this is.

The second question, “When were you born?” Just curiousity I suppose.

“Vamprism, just as with any other -Ism, has it’s pros and cons, it’s ups and downs. Currently, with my stay at the hotel and my… falling out with my bretheren, no. I am not enjoying my state right now. As with many other -Isms, this one is unchangable. Once a vampire, always a vampire. No worries, however. I will soon be out of this little rut and get back to enjoying it.”

“And I was born into life in 1789. I was born into unlife in 1813.”

11.13.06 - GremlinRuh asks:

Were you nobility before you became a vampire or was that something you were… uh… ‘unborn’ (I guess that would be right) into?

“Unborn into. While living, I did enjoy a pampered life of prestige, I was not the actual ruler of Austria. The people might have noticed if I were suddenly not aging, hm? No, my position is… was held within the Devil’s Court. Austria has a very small, but very old collection of vampires that don’t get along particularly well with the court. I, being very young in comparison, was given the title to act as a sort of liason. Of course, those old bats didn’t care much for me, either, so it’s really more of an honorary title. I was just the only Austrian the Court cared for.”

11.14.06 - the aptly named crazyninny asks:

*Forever proud that she got to touch Uriah, and live to tell the tale.* *But anger that she isn’t a type AB… *

Archduke Uraih, did you marry into power before, or after you was reborn? Can you tell us and thing on the Mistress that made you? Why did you move from your native Austria, to America? Why New Jersey?
Can you tell us anything on how you and Edgar meet? And, have you made anyone into a vampire too? Isn’t it getting harder to hold your ‘hunger’ with new flesh coming into the inn?

*Batters.*

“Your questions are becoming increasingly invasive, my dear. I married a member of the Austrian royal family while alive. Vampires tend not to marry, as it’s often a holy thing, and therefore it’s something we avoid. Will I tell you more about my Mistress? No. I came to the United States during a time of war for personal reasons. As for Edgar and myself, I first met him when he was still quite young. The circumstances of which I will not divulge. And while a steady diet of chicken blood isn’t particularly healthy, it does keep me satiated enough to stave off any hunger. I do have a good deal of control over my more primal urges.”